I woke up with the police in my living room and my two year old son running around – not knowing how I got there again. My thirteen year old daughter was on her way home from school and was greeted by an ambulance and two police cars outside our front door…. I would like to say this was the last time I drunk and used cocaine but that would be a lie, The twelve step programme works but you have to work it.
Arriving at Rehab
I originally arrived in rehab in June 2009. I knew I was going in with a drink and drug problem but I tried to stop for all the wrong reasons. None of the reasons I was stopping was for me: I didn’t want the father of my child to leave; I didn’t want to lose my children; I didn’t want to use every day; etc etc. I could stop for a day but I could never stay stopped.
I was relieved to arrive in rehab and learn that I suffered from the illness of addiction. For years my family and friends would say ‘can’t you give up not even for your children?’. I understood that I could never give up on my own. I have now learned that the solution I yearned for was the twelve step programme.
After Putting Down the Drink and Drugs
After putting the drink and drugs down for the first time I was in recovery for eight months. I was clean and sober but I was not experiencing any emotional sobriety. My life was more miserable than when I was using. I put my solution of drink and drugs down and had nothing to substitute it so I fixed on men
and food – anything to change the way I felt. After a turbulent time with my son’s father and me not working a program I relapsed and turned back to what I knew best – alcohol and cocaine. Everything was worse then it was previously. Social Services became involved with my children. My father tried his up most best to get me sectioned. I had no life at all, just a miserable existence. Thankfully the twelve step programme works and somebody carried out the important twelfth step on me.
The Twelve Step Programme at The Haynes Clinic
The Haynes Clinic loved me when I was unable to love myself. They really helped me not just put down drink and drugs this time but to understand that my whole behaviour had to change. They taught me the 12 step programme, and I finally understood that drink and drugs were my solution and the problem was me.
Today I am a full time mum to both of my children. I am a loving daughter and sister and accountable for my actions. I attend regular meetings and work the twelve step programme in all aspects of my life. My life is so full of gratitude now and for that I’m truly happy.
If somebody as hopeless as me can turn their life around then anyone can.
The Haynes Clinic is an alcohol rehab and alcohol addiction treatment centre which not only successfully teaches people how to stop drinking but also offers drug rehabilitation treatment. Call us on 01462 851414
