Your loved one has now completed his / her treatment programme. If they have completed the full programme (28 days plus) they should know exactly what they need to do in order to stay clean and sober and they should be willing to and allowed to take responsibility for their own recovery. What they should be doing and what families should expect is listed below. For anyone who has been in treatment for a shorter time eg for a detox, they may need more support and prompting to follow the programme which will help them to maintain their sobriety.
Steps to follow – what families should expect
Most addiction rehab centres are 12 Step Treatment Centres. As this has been proven to be the most successful way for people to achieve and maintain sobriety. Your loved one should immediately on discharge from the clinic start to attend 12 Step Fellowship meetings. He or she should attend these in person if they are available in your area. During the Covid Pandemic the majority of meetings are being held online but there are some face to face ones.
Once the Covid situation has been resolved then meetings should be attended face to face whenever possible. Meetings should be a priority in the recovering alcoholic / addict’s life. As many as possible should be attended. Some people decide to do 90 meetings in 90 days. But if the individual has many other commitments they should attend at least 4 a week to start with.
Importance of the sponsor
At these meetings they should get a sponsor – this is a mentor who will go through the 12 Step Programme with them (again – even though they will have done this in the clinic). This is important as the sponsor will have his or her own way of working the programme and it will enable them to get to know fully and thoroughly your loved one (their sponsee).
As they go through the programme, there will be assignments to work on and reading to do – and once they get towards the end of the programme, your loved one will start to do his or her inventory with their sponsor each day. It may be that this will take place from day 1 of their relationship with their sponsor if the individual wants to carry on with the process started at the clinic (if your loved one got as far as step 10).\
SO IT IS ABSOLUTELY VITAL THAT THOSE LEAVING A REHAB CLINIC ATTEND 12 STEP MEETINGS, GET A SPONSOR AND WORK THE PROGRAMME. IF THEY DO NOT, THEY HAVE LITTLE CHANCE OF STAYING CLEAN AND SOBER.
Warning signs to look out for
- Excuses for not attending meetings (this must be a priority – without our sobriety we risk everything else important to us)
- Excuses for not contacting a sponsor e.g. the sponsor is ill / away etc. Most sponsors are available at all times for those needing them
- Agitation, being restless, uncomfortable – avoiding you / difficult conversations. These are signs of wanting to drink or use – or having already done so. You know your loved one and the signs. If you are suspicious of what they have been up to, you are probably right.
- Anger and discontent, no gratitude – as above, signs that things are not as they should be
- Getting in contact with old drinking / using friends – these have to be given a wide berth and ideally dropped altogether
- Still glorifying the days of drinking or using with their stories