Is there a reason why people become an alcoholic or addict? People who drink too much or who use drugs addictively will often tell you it is because of something that has happened in their life. For example, they were abused as a child, they had an unstable or bad upbringing, their parents divorced. They themselves have had a difficult marriage / relationship, they are depressed, bereaved, worried, anxious, bored through lockdown….
A Reason why people become an alcoholic or an addict
Some of these reasons are valid and explain why we might have had one too many for a period of time. But they do not fully explain addiction. Many people who have been through much worse experiences will not become alcoholics and addicts. Not all people who are depressed, anxious, stressed or bored will turn to drink or drugs as a way out.
Addiction is a family illness. This is true in two ways. First, addiction tends to have genetic links. If there is an alcoholic or addict in your family, then you yourself are more likely to become an alcoholic or addict. That said, it does not mean that you WILL become one. Just that there will be a predisposition towards it. Addiction is also a family illness in another sense. In that having an alcoholic or addict in the family has an impact on the whole family. Parents become desperate for their adult children. Relationships become strained and often break. And the alcoholic or addict disrupts family life in several ways.
Addiction and traumatic experiences
So it is true that you are more likely to become an alcoholic or addict if you have had a traumatic childhood. Or difficult and challenging experiences in your life. You are more likely to become an alcoholic or addict if you have a family history of it. And you are more likely to become an alcoholic or addict if you are a naturally anxious person who lacks confidence etc. But none of this can justify or fully explain the addiction. As there will be many other people who have had worse experiences. Who are equally anxious etc and do not go on to become alcoholics and addicts. Likewise, there will be many family members in families with addicts and alcoholics who do not become alcoholics or addicts themselves.
Most of us will become alcoholics or alcoholics inadvertently. And not realise the way we are heading until it is too late. Something which might start off as fun becomes a habit. Then it becomes controlling and finally destructive. If we do not catch it when it is a habit, it is too late.
Recovery is possible
That said, whether you get to be an alcoholic due to it being in your genes, due to a difficult or traumatic experience in your past or because you are anxious, stressed, lacking in confidence or for whatever reason, there is no reason for you to stay in the addiction. Recovery is possible. A good quality and sustainable recovery is not just about stopping drinking or using. It is about getting to the bottom of why we found relief in alcohol, or drugs in the first place – dealing with those sometimes deep seated issues – and learning to cope with how we feel without alcohol or a substance.
That is why people go to private addiction clinic – to get to deal with their issues and see things differently so they can live happy and fulfilled lives without substances.