Although we stop drinking, gambling or using, a lot of the thoughts in our head remain the same and we need to get to a place where we can deal with these or else they will lead us back to our addiction(s). We need to be relaxed and free from the old addiction thinking ways and consider whether our thoughts are helping us to stay sober or whether it is a way of thinking which is not good for us. A few examples may help here.
When we were younger and first started to drink or use, it made us feel grown up and sophisticated. It may have made us feel brave and defiant and we might have liked that feeling. Drinking or using may have made us feel attractive or successful, or maybe it led us into company that seemed exciting and powerful. For some of us, we associated our drinking or using with being risk takers, living on the edge of society, perhaps being on the edge of criminal acts or even directly involving us in criminal activity.
Thinking and Feelings
It was exciting. Whatever the positive or negative feelings we had around drinking or using, we need to let them go and recognise that such a way of thinking will not help us in our new life in recovery. If we continue to value thoughts around drinking or using, we will go back there – and to the misery surrounding it.
Maybe in our old days our drinking or using was an important part of our social life. Maybe it enlivened many an occasion, was fun and harmless. Now though we have to let that thought go – that we need to drink or use to enjoy ourselves.
Was it really that essential to having a good time or enjoying a good meal? The answer has to be no – and many of us can speak from experience here. Think of it this way, when we were younger, as children, we did not need a chemical substance to enjoy ourselves. And it is possible to relearn that it is possible to let go, relax and have a good time without the accompanying affect of drink or drugs.
Behaviors Were Unacceptable
What about getting drunk or out of it? Most of us now know that our behaviour was unacceptable when we were like that and are not sorry to let that side of our old behaviour stay in the past. Some people (usually those who have not experienced addiction) still find such a state amusing. Most of us, though, are not sorry to leave hangovers and other physical after effects of a binge well and truly in the past.
Alcohol and drugs alter our consciousness and if abused do long term physical damage – to our organs, our stomachs, our blood, our brains, our mouths, our muscles etc. These substances are harmful and can kill. We need not to think what help these were to us – but what harms they did and continue to do to those around us – we only have to look or go to meetings of AA or NA.
Willpower will not keep us off drink or drugs – accepting that we can never drink or use again and changing our old ideas will.
If you have an alcohol or drug related problem. Please call 01462 851414 for free and confidential advice and help.